Saturday, December 31, 2005

Illustration Friday - Flavor

Flavor Flaaaaaav!

Sorry too much "Strange Love".

Alright... So what we have here is something I did awhile ago and modified slightly to fit the parameters of this week's Illustration Friday. It's my attempt at easy-to-use prosthetics. Ah screw on appendages, what a convenience.

Hope it gives you a laugh. If not, I won't cry. Probably most likely I won't cry.

And since I've lured you here I might as well just sound off on this that and the other. You're under no obligation to stay so feel free to surf away.

Ok... Thank you to those of you who stayed and my apologies in advance.

1. George Bush - What can I say that hasn't already been said. Fuck it... I'm just gonna repeat it. You're a liar, or you're just plain stupid. Or maybe you're both. You're an inept monkey. You've said history will show you were in the right. History is littered with pompous assholes who've said those same words. You won't be imortalized in the history books, instead your face will be in the dictionary next to the definition of the word "jackass"... jackass.

And for crying out loud, it's NOO-CLEE-UR not NU-QUE-LUR. Please do me a solid and learn to pronounce your "weapon of mass destruction" correctly... Idiot!

2. Gay Marriage - I don't understand what the hang up is about this. How does this affect heterosexual marriages? How does this devalue your marriage? Why do you care so much about what other people do so long as it is not harmful to you. It is not your business, so butt out. Don't go quoting scriptures on me or any other religious text. Believe it or not, there are people out there who don't believe the same thing as you.

This is about human rights. How dare you dictate to someone that they are not to be afforded the same rights as you.

3. Put Down the Cellphone, X-Box, Blackberry, Palm Pilot, iPod, etc etc. - Do you remember being bored? Do you remember when you used to have to find ways to keep yourself occupied? It's like people can't spend one minute without fiddling with some electronic thingy to keep them from being bored.

Boredom is creativity. Nothing creative and new comes from a mind that never has a chance to be bored.
Boredom is the time when you have a chance to stop and really think about things, to try and understand things that you have been too busy to really think about.

I really have fears about this generation of kids who sit in the back of the minvan and are subjected to an in-car DVD for a friggin' 20 minute drive. Talk to your kid. Sing with your kid. Spend that 20 minutes listening to your kid. Stop being so damn selfish and shoving a DVD in to keep them quiet so you can relax. You have kids, you don't get to relax anymore. I should be so lucky.

4. A positive note - Ok look... I can't end the year on such a negative rant, so let me just say that alot of people this year came through for me and my wife in a very big way. We were touched by the compassion and concern that came from people both inside and outside our circle of friends and family. Sometimes you take people for granted, because they are always just there, but you really appreciate them when you need them the most.

Alright that's it.. I'm grabbing 2006 by the balls and I'm not letting go. Well I'll let go for 2007. Wait scratch that... no not that! I'm not grabbing anything by the balls.

Happy New Year, keep doodlin'

Friday, December 23, 2005

Illustration Friday – Holiday

Technically this does not really depict a holiday, but let's say that we have opened our presents, stuffed ourselves with turkey, and decided to get a little exercise by heading out to build a snowman.

This is a lino print created for our 2005 company holiday card. I enjoyed doing it, and want to make more attempts at creating something so hands on. If anyone has any resources about lino printing they want to share with me, I would love to know about them.

Well one more Friday and we roll into 2006. About 2005, all I can say is that you were nice to me for a little while, and then you turned in to a real bitch/bastard. And now I look back and see that the good my wife and I are trying to do would never have come about had we not gone through what we had this year... Still... It's a damn huge price to pay to be more enlightened and aware of the world around us, but we both agree we could never go back.

If I have one wish this season, it's that you go and do something good. Doesn't have to be big.

Say "thank you" to someone, hold the door, stop driving that gas guzzler, if it's financially possible for you, do not shop at Wal-Mart, turn the TV off and go for a walk with your spouse, stick ten bucks in someone's pocket when they're not looking.

May you enjoy a peaceful holiday season.


UPDATE: I had a little trouble following my own advice. There were a couple of drunken Jerks on the train on the way home yammering in to their cellphones so that everyone could hear them all the way home. They thought they were hilarious. Really... they were just pathetic. Grow up, 4PM and you're shitfaced from an office party outing? What the fuck?

I wanted to punch them both in the head, but I didn't like the thought of spending the holidays in jail. So I wrote a full account of their assholish behaviour and left if on the seat as I exited the train hoping they would find it.

Not very nice I know... but at least they got to keep their teeth, and I got to stay out of trouble.

Uh... Merry Christmas.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

I'm back... Illustration Friday - Imagine

I'm back.

I knew I would fall. I said I would. I made it perfectly clear.

But I'm back. So let's let bygones be bygones, let's kiss and make up... Jeez did anyone even miss me?

OK so to commemorate my momentous return, I've created an all new piece of artwork for Illustration Friday. It's bold, it's bright, it's bombastic... just what the heck IS it?

Use your imagination.